Changing Course

Turtle, bike ride, deer, gardens 136Summer afternoon, summer afternoon; to me those have always been the two most beautiful words in the English language.  ~ Henry James

This month, I’ve been “working ahead,” so I won’t fall too far behind as I heal from a foot surgery that had been scheduled for this Friday. But, after a long talk with the surgeon this morning, I decided against the surgery, as it seems the procedure he now feels would be best would also be more complicated than we first thought. Since it is not-yet-necessary, I’ll continue to deal with the relative discomfort, for now. 

Turtle, bike ride, deer, gardens 012

Turtle, bike ride, deer, gardens 073

I feel a bit like a ship that just missed an iceberg; all the engines have been thrown into reverse and I’m about to start forward again, but my heart is saying, “Wait.” My mind and spirit haven’t caught up yet. All the tasks I’d normally tackle are already finished, and all the speculations and decisions I’d cast forward around the weeks to come have suddenly vanished. Part of me was almost looking forward to lying on the couch with a raised foot, watching all the episodes of Game of Thrones and being cared for by my darling husband. But I also feel relieved that the riskier and more complex surgery can be put off, for now.

And now I can take time to smell the flowers, change my course from being so future-oriented to entering the present more fully, as I realize (again…sigh) I should have been doing all along.

Turtle, bike ride, deer, gardens 003 Turtle, bike ride, deer, gardens 041 Turtle, bike ride, deer, gardens 085 Turtle, bike ride, deer, gardens 106 Turtle, bike ride, deer, gardens 165 Turtle, bike ride, deer, gardens 171I’ve also thought about all the people facing surgeries they can’t postpone; by contrast, my need to undo plans and schedules that my over-organized mind has arranged seems insignificant. I’m grateful for the time I’ve been given to wait and discern my course, and hope for less invasive procedures to be created.

So, I’m heading out on my bike to relax and let go of all the anxiety and calculations, the planning and imagining, the endless detritus collected when the calendar boxes are filled, circled and underlined…back to the blank pages and the healing openness of a glorious summer afternoon.

Turtle, bike ride, deer, gardens 016 Turtle, bike ride, deer, gardens 055 Turtle, bike ride, deer, gardens 083 Turtle, bike ride, deer, gardens 126 Turtle, bike ride, deer, gardens 160

Peace to all those facing diagnoses and surgeries that can’t be removed from the calendar; may the sleepy green and fragrant peace of a summer afternoon surround their hearts and spirits, and bless them through their healing course to a new wholeness.

Turtle, bike ride, deer, gardens 140

13 thoughts on “Changing Course

  1. I am happy for you, Kitty, that you don’t have to go through the surgery, and the recovery afterwards. But of course, I don’t know what the condition is exactly, and how much you are suffering from it… so it’s hard to comment. I have known a number of such cases, operations on feet and legs… and even on a knee… among the people I know. Sometimes they have been very successful, but not always… there is always so many deliberations and worries regarding such an operation. I do hope you are not suffering. Loved your pictures as always. Hoping for good health and limber limbs.

    • Thank you, Shimon…No, I am inconvenienced, but not suffering. In the end, I have to listen to my intuition and while it’s never easy for me to reverse my course, for now, I think it’s right to wait. I appreciate your wisdom so much; thank you, again.

  2. How lovely that you now have blank pages to fill….that’s a rather wonderful state of affairs, and at such a lovely time of the year too…..now may I suggest a picnic with a little bubbly to begin? And leave a glass for me!

    I’m glad the surgery has been delayed if it isn’t required yet and hope the problems with your foot improve, but the idea of lounging around and watching Game of Thrones episodes DOES sound appealing, lol…I too love that series, especially the intro and the music!!

    What awesome pics, I wish I was on that path an a bike, it looks full of delicious treats and views. I love the terrapin, if it is one, it’s more colourful than ours, and I love the Water Lilly’s, now I can look forward to the flowers….oh yes….and the Fireflies!!! I can’t wait to see them twinkling, I can imagine the pics taken without a flash….I suppose a flash would confuse them…..Is the first pic taken from a window? I do LOVE that one.

    Happy days eh!!! xxxx

  3. Thank you, Snow Bird: the picnic is a great suggestion! 🙂 And yes, as I mentioned above, it’s sooooo hard to listen to and trust my intuition, but the surgeon, while he was fairly sure about the more complex surgery, didn’t convince me he was as confident about actually doing it as I’d like to believe…so, not now.

    I’ll try for fireflies photos; they’re tricky because of the light level, as you say, and my camera doesn’t have a lot of choices for shutter speed/apertures…we’ll see. The lightning bugs usually come out by the end of June.

    That first photo is looking through a culvert on the bike trail. It’s like a short tunnel running under a road. The bike trail, heading west from my home, travels through some small farm country, past a lake, and then into a nature preserve with marshes and open fields before heading towards Madison (state capitol). So many birds! And now, the wild roses are blooming like mad and there are so many varieties of grasses. It’s a true gift, that’s for sure.

    Peace to your week.

  4. Fabulous pictures Kitty…As always! Sorry to hear your foot is giving you trouble. I hope not so much you can’t take your beloved walks or tend your gardens. You have so much more summer than we do!!! I’m amazed. I only have three flowers blooming right now….The only thing doing well is the weeds. Figures 🙂 Oh well, as you well know, you win some and you lose some. Next summer I hope. Enjoy your glorious beauty there and get better soon my friend….Happy weekending! VK xxoo

    • Oh, I’m so sorry you’re having a “weak” summer…there’s so much more to come that I hope it will get better for you. Were now beginning a very, very hot streak and in need of a good rain, which, after last year, makes me a tad nervous…just as then, we’ve had rain fall all around our county but not here. Looks like we might get some today! My hope is that your gardens will dry and perk up. 🙂 Happy Solstice!

  5. I LOVE the multi-colored turtle. Turtle is “my” animal, but I’ve never seen one so colorful. I always thought they were blah and unexciting. This one sure isn’t. (There’s a metaphor for me to ponder!) Thanks.

    • I think this is little painted turtle; it was a vivid visitor! Just passing through, like so many of our guests…I thank you so much for visiting, too, Amma, and for taking the time to share. Your wisdom and willingness to ponder inspires me and invites my spirit to do likewise!

  6. I’m glad that the surgery can be put off for a while and you can enjoy the summer despite some discomfort. I guess there is also relief from thinking of what complications the surgery may have. Life sometimes unfold in ways beyond our wildest imagination because the Unseen Hand up there knows what is best for us beyond our usual comprehension. There is so much beauty around you that’s waiting for your appreciation so enjoy the best of summer. 😉

    • You’re right, Malou. I feel like my intuition/the Spirit helped me make the right call, and I’m enjoying every minute of my summer…beastly hot, but not beastly hot and unable to move with a cast on my leg! 🙂 We’re having a lot of fun, and I know you’re looking forward to your break, too: may it be a wonderful trip and full of terrific photo-opportunities!

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